Because Admitting You Have A Problem Is The First Step To Solving It.

Someone asked me this week why I blog. It's an interesting question, because I suppose everybody has a reason. I first started blogging because I was studying journalism, and some employers won't even consider you for a job unless you blog regularly. I also blog because I find it quite therapeutic, and I get a lot of positive feedback from people. I've also heard the criticisms - I don't really care what people have to say; they're still reading it. Obviously, I'm now just blogging for the big bucks - and in the hope someone will want to make a film about my life. I'd like Scarlett Johannson to play me. And I'd have "Something Inside So Strong" as the title song. I've not really thought about it though.  

Anyway, the same person who asked me why I blog also got me to look over a post of their own. It was centered around how they were feeling about someone they loved who had hurt them. It was quite specific and although it was well-written, it was equally obvious who it was aimed at. Regardless, it got me thinking; do boys actually realise what they do to a girl when they hurt them?

Now before an outcry comes from the male human race that girls hurt boys too - I know that. I've done it; in some ways we probably do it a lot better. So I look forward to reading a post from a guy that explains it from the other side. But as a girl, I'm going to talk about how it feels to be hurt by a boy.

When he makes negative comments about how you look. When he talks about how pretty other girls are in front of you. When he sleeps with someone else, whether it's behind your back or blatantly. When he ignores you for no apparent reason. When he says he loves you then does something completely contrary to the meaning of those three words. When he eats the last chip (I'm kidding). I could go on and on; all of these actions are detrimental to a girls confidence and make them feel like absolute shit. I can't put it any simpler.

The reason I'm talking about this is because I feel there is a constant pressure for girls to be strong and maintain a "big girls don't cry" mentality. I'm an expert at putting on a brave front - I had to endure 3 vaccination jags this week - but sometimes it's healthier to confront a problem. No girl wants to admit they got hurt, or spent hours crying over someone who they felt didn't give a shit - but we all have, and at some point we probably all will again. Some girls, myself included at times, can be of the opinion that revealing feelings of hurt can give satisfaction to the boy doing it - but if that's the case when you tell someone they've upset you then you don't want to be with them anyway. Bye. See ya! Win, win.

So girls, my consensus is that next time a boy hurts you - tell him. Mope around about it, bitch about it, cry about or blog about it all you want, but get to the root of the problem. Because I guarantee you, if you've always been there for the person you love, at some point they'll realise and regret the mistakes they made. And then the satisfaction is all yours.